The Long Road Back From Medication 12 Nov 2014

You become so desperate that you’re willing to try anything to get better. It’s a good thing to a certain extent. It shows that you’re at the stage where you want help in any form. I’m a long way from that time, but in order to get here I started taking anti-depressants and beta blockers. I’m sure that without them I wouldn’t be in the position I am now but they have a lasting effect. I’ve decided that I want to get off them, they’re starting to scare me, they’re like a fake reality that’s projected in front of my...

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CBT Round 3 28 Oct 2014

This was a very short session clocking in at 30 minutes over the phone. I can see what we’re trying to achieve through CBT but it just seems a bit pointless, I don’t think we really covered much of importance. I much prefer in person sessions as I can’t distract myself or become distracted by other things as easily. I don’t really have much to report on this session, in the next sessions we’ll be covering breathing techniques to help bring my anxiety down and help control panic attacks more. I’d be interested to see what other people’s CBT session...

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Time 27 Oct 2014

Time is a funny thing, we emblazen it on our phones, our wrists, on our walls in every facet of our daily lives. It controls us whether we like it or not. When I first experienced death it was one of the hardest things to deal with, the resounding thing that people said was that “time heals everything”. Well I call bullshit to this day I’m still hurt by the death of my grandmother. She was a wonderful person taken from us far too early. Time really is a funny thing. You can listen to a ticking clock and witness...

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The Drop Layout 24 Oct 2014

Ever since I bought a Pure Pro I’ve sort of been obsessed with the world of mechanical keyboards. As a developer I want to make sure I’m happy typing on something day in day out. It’s also very important that I can type fast and accurate so I have to be 100% happy with a keyboard. I’ve recently sold my Pure Pro which I was pretty happy with as it’s just not for me. I bought a Poker 2 ANSI (American layout) as a temporary replacement to it which I’ve been more than happy with. It currently has Raindrop keys...

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PHPNW14 Short Review 22 Oct 2014

Instead of a long post going into each sessions I attended I figured you’re probably just best watching them when they’re on YouTube as it was an excellent conference. So I’d like to quickly run through the things I really enjoyed about the conference and why I’ll be attending without fail next year. The Venue - Surprisingly good tbh, I’m always weary of conference venues but this was pretty cool, especially the pendulum in the main entrance way. The Talks - Superb as per usual, the keynote from ircmaxell was really good. The standard of talks was super high as...

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