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This was a very short session clocking in at 30 minutes over the phone. I can see what we’re trying to achieve through CBT but it just seems a bit pointless, I don’t think we really covered much of importance. I much prefer in person sessions as I can’t distract myself or become distracted by other things as easily.

Time is a funny thing, we emblazon it on our phones, our wrists, on our walls in every facet of our daily lives. It controls us whether we like it or not.

Ever since I bought a Pure Pro I’ve sort of been obsessed with the world of mechanical keyboards. As a developer I want to make sure I’m happy typing on something day in day out. It’s also very important that I can type fast and accurate so I have to be 100% happy with a keyboard. I’ve recently sold my Pure Pro which I was pretty happy with as it’s just not for me. I bought a Poker 2 ANSI (American layout) as a temporary replacement to it which I’ve been more than happy with. It currently has Raindrop keys on and a Tex acrylic case, it’s the nicest keyboard I’ve ever had the pleasure of typing on.

Instead of a long post going into each sessions I attended I figured you’re probably just best watching them when they’re on YouTube as it was an excellent conference. So I’d like to quickly run through the things I really enjoyed about the conference and why I’ll be attending without fail next year.

I had my second round of CBT today and it went much better than the first round. This time I took a bottle of water with me it gave me something to focus on and stop my hands from getting all weird, it’s also amazing how thirsty you get during these things.

Today I had my first CBT session. I’m hugely conflicted, I don’t know what I was expecting. My session was just a reiteration of the initial phone introduction. It seemed like a waste of time to me, I’m not discounting CBT at all.

Again it’s been too long since my last post, I seem to come up with ideas and start planning it out in my head only to end up with a rambling nonsensical rant on where I am and what I’ve gone through. This time I’m going to structure it and make sure I get my point across.

It’s been a few weeks since I last posted. I’ve decided to be frank about all of this, I want to be honest with myself and others. I’ve found that writing things down helps to organise my thoughts.

Hi everyone, Firstly thank you so much for getting in touch, I’m overwhelmed by the response from people. I’m sorry to say I just can’t reply to everyone it may seem odd but it’s a lot of work I’m just not ready for.

I’ve been suffering from depression and severe anxiety for the past 6 months now. It’s costing me my girlfriend, job and most importantly my life. I woke up yesterday with my heart pounding out of my chest, I got ready for work and then threw up, I felt dizzy and very scared. All because of everything that’s going on in my life. All because I’ve had the worst week of my entire life.